From the word GO.

Apprehension. That's what she felt. It all started with her saying Yes. 'Yes' to new beginning, to new environment, to new situations, to new people, to new temperaments. The 'Yes' meant she was ready to take on this responsibility. That she is going to submit to whatever came her way as part and parcel of these new state of affairs. Apprehension - a fearful expectation. She had said 'Yes', because there was no reason for her to say No. Thinking back, she was amazed at herself that she had taken the initial steps without any uncertainties, without a doubt moved ahead with positive steps, flowed down just like water, nothing could stop her even when there were obstacles in her way, she made way finding path in any nook and crevice between the rocks and tried reaching her destination - unprotected and vulnerable, but still moving on. No one to turn to, with whom she can share her suspicions, who can guide her through her skepticism, who can negate her doubts, rubbish her incertitude. She looks around and finds no one. No one, who can tell her with certainty that all is going to be fine, do not worry, what you have decided is not going to fall off the highest cliff ever. There are few people who are either envious of her convictions or feel that the strength that she has got will take her ahead on her own, so they never lend her a hand or a shoulder for support. So she fights alone, always have in the past, and possibly in the future too. But right now, she is apprehensive. Perhaps a phase, like all the others that have come in the past. This too shall pass away - is what has always kept her going. 

Hurts..

How some people have the power to shake the spirit! By actions or words! Those are the ones who matter. The rest are just living souls roaming around in the vast wasteland. 

Well, this is what I wrote yesterday when something hurt real badly and there was no way I could have escaped it.. or probably I could have but I had no idea how to do so.. The formation of knots in the throat, choking of the words and tears springing in my eyes, both hurt and anger in the head, clotting pain at constricting temples, the heart still wants not to believe and forget what happened.. coz this pain will vanish in a moment with just slight change in actions/ words by the same people who caused this all melodramatic pain... 

I think the reason to let go of all this pain is the love you have for that person and there comes in the selflessness coz of the unconditional love and so one good moment after the incident will make you forget the pain till the next time it comes back.. and don't be under any pretense... it will come back.. for sure..!! 

So in the meantime, keep enjoying the pain... 

Till next time, Cheers... 

- A