We are going to pull you down.!!??

Plans are building up, the windmill has started running. 

You know you are a little different from other people - in a good way or bad way - make your own choice. You want to do something big, something for which you will be recognized, a name to reckon for. You feel you had no special talent but still you have pinned down your niche. You have picked up a certain direction towards which you want to work for that elusive success. The idea seems feasible, you think about it. And then some more. You conclude that its worth a shot and you start acting upon it.

The idea grows on you. The whole thing is still an idea but the complete image looks beautiful to you. You even have timelines for it broken down to long term and short term goals. This is how serious you are for this dream of yours. The hopes are high, the plans are set. Everything is so perfect in your mind that you are bursting with pleasure and are in a dreamy state about it. You want to wait for the world to see and acknowledge the success of the picture that you have created in your head. 

Yet that is going to take time as it is just an idea that you have right now. And one day you are sitting with someone close and whom you trust, and then you start sharing your plan with the intent of getting them to conform with the idea or maybe also dismiss your unspoken doubts, but instead you get a condescending look implying "are you out of your friggin' mind!! what made you think you can even try something like that? Haven't you got something better to do rather - maybe at your current work place or with your personal life - like go out, meet people? What is up with all this new non-sense?" One look says the most of it or sometimes it is even a rhetorical question back at you, something like "Whaaattt? Now you want to become Shobha De?" And you end up thinking, where did this come from? When this close person should very well be knowing that you hate the guts of Shobha De for being what she is - well, as a writer - to be precise. And why do you think this person will know that you hate her, is because of the simple reason that you yourself have told her innumerable times in your past conversations. 

There are doubts in the mind of people. There are people who will always think that you can't do anything or whatever you are saying you want to do - its all bluffing. They will be sarcastic, they might even look down on you thinking this one is so young, s/he can't possibly do what s/he intends to achieve. There will be sardonic laughs or just a blank face - incriminating that you will let yourself down. Or possibly let them down..!! So, what is their fear for not letting you try what you want to do with your life. It won't even matter if these people are not the only two people whose opinion matter to you or who you consider will always support you, no matter what. Don't know what hurts the more - the mistrust of these in you or your trust in them. :)

Till next one...!!

Cheers..

- A