We are going to pull you down.!!??

Plans are building up, the windmill has started running. 

You know you are a little different from other people - in a good way or bad way - make your own choice. You want to do something big, something for which you will be recognized, a name to reckon for. You feel you had no special talent but still you have pinned down your niche. You have picked up a certain direction towards which you want to work for that elusive success. The idea seems feasible, you think about it. And then some more. You conclude that its worth a shot and you start acting upon it.

The idea grows on you. The whole thing is still an idea but the complete image looks beautiful to you. You even have timelines for it broken down to long term and short term goals. This is how serious you are for this dream of yours. The hopes are high, the plans are set. Everything is so perfect in your mind that you are bursting with pleasure and are in a dreamy state about it. You want to wait for the world to see and acknowledge the success of the picture that you have created in your head. 

Yet that is going to take time as it is just an idea that you have right now. And one day you are sitting with someone close and whom you trust, and then you start sharing your plan with the intent of getting them to conform with the idea or maybe also dismiss your unspoken doubts, but instead you get a condescending look implying "are you out of your friggin' mind!! what made you think you can even try something like that? Haven't you got something better to do rather - maybe at your current work place or with your personal life - like go out, meet people? What is up with all this new non-sense?" One look says the most of it or sometimes it is even a rhetorical question back at you, something like "Whaaattt? Now you want to become Shobha De?" And you end up thinking, where did this come from? When this close person should very well be knowing that you hate the guts of Shobha De for being what she is - well, as a writer - to be precise. And why do you think this person will know that you hate her, is because of the simple reason that you yourself have told her innumerable times in your past conversations. 

There are doubts in the mind of people. There are people who will always think that you can't do anything or whatever you are saying you want to do - its all bluffing. They will be sarcastic, they might even look down on you thinking this one is so young, s/he can't possibly do what s/he intends to achieve. There will be sardonic laughs or just a blank face - incriminating that you will let yourself down. Or possibly let them down..!! So, what is their fear for not letting you try what you want to do with your life. It won't even matter if these people are not the only two people whose opinion matter to you or who you consider will always support you, no matter what. Don't know what hurts the more - the mistrust of these in you or your trust in them. :)

Till next one...!!

Cheers..

- A

Traffic Jam and Life...

Any coincidences there if I say that we are all stuck in a traffic jam or we are stuck in a life…!! was watching a scene from a movie when it struck me that our expectations from traffic jams and life are almost the same… there is an inherent desire that we always get smooth road ahead with no bumps, or crazy drivers jumping-in in front, vehicles coming in from wrong directions, people suddenly appearing on turns to cross streets, or someone parking right in the spot when you had a hard time finding that spot in the busiest market or someone honking incessantly on your tail or someone blocking your way to go ahead even when there is available space... some usual scenarios which we really want to avoid or wish they never happen while we are on the road... 

So the scene from the movie - 

A guy just stops his car in the middle of the road as he sees his fiancee/ to-be-wife (as this is their wedding day) is returning back from the chapel without waiting for him to reach there and it is totally his fault as he told her over the phone just a few moments ago that he can't marry her... but still stops as he remembers the past few years that they had spent together and what it could have been, if it would have been moments... and in the meantime the girl gets down and scowls, berates, and thrashes him... and her girl friends push her and take her away to her home... now this guy stands and wonders in the middle of the road what should he do next... actually he is blank... maybe perplexed by the whole situation which he is now into... though he is not yet analysing how this happened or why it happened or who is responsible for all this but he is just standing unknown of the fact of his location... and just then another kind of impatient-yet-patient-to-let-all-this-drama-to-happen guy sitting in a car behind honks and shouts out loud, "Make a move man...!! Don't just stand there...!!"

All this was quite interesting, not because it was some emotional scene from a romantic mushy movie but because in life also we need such people around who can tell us or even shout at us - "Make a move man...!! Don't just stand there...!!" coz there are times when it takes so much time just to understand what has happened to one, how it happened, why it happened, why to me, why not to someone else, what did I do wrong, what did the other person did wrong, whose fault was it, who is to be blamed, why is God doing this to me, and all those things... someone needs to just push you ahead in life so that you don't get stuck in the situation, so that later in life you realize that how much time has been wasted on the things that could have been worked out better, if there was someone to give that faith to you... Faith to move ahead, strength to take that step... and to keep flowing - just like the water...!! 

To water, this time... Cheers...!!

- A

What if...??

There won't be any person I guess who at any point in life stood at a point which lead him to two paths*, and both gave some kind of hope, a wish, may be a promise for the changing future - future changing for the better;  followed by a huge Dilemma - What if...? 

It's like - a devil's been chasing you (that's the present situation) and you are running away from it, you run with all the strength in you, the devil is picking up speed and closing in on you... you strive for your life, you pray for more strength, you can't fight it as you obviously see that its more powerful than you, you wish for some kind of miracle to happen, you wish either it disappears magically or you become invisible... you enter a chaotic jungle, which is a new ground for you, you don't know where the next turn will lead you to... in so much chase you start losing your breath, your strength, your will & with it - your hope... but there is a belief somewhere in you which still pushes you to carry on... still fight against it... so you focus on the future, forgetting what's behind you... you start looking forward... for any escapes where you can lose the big bad demon and build something new... so with regained spirit you start looking out for more... and there comes a  point where there are two paths for you to take where you can change the situation for the better. Now, in that split second, you gotta decide which one you ought to be on. And in this split second, you can do 2 things to choose the path; one, on the basis of your past experiences or second, go by your gut feeling... and once you are almost 99% sure about the path you need to take on - then comes the question - What IF...?? 

You can fill in all the What IF questions yourself, but the doubt, the hitch that to take that step ahead remains... there is anxiety which what will happen ahead... you are hanging between hope and fear... and then you say Chuck It.. you relinquish all your fears and take on a path (most likely with your gut...)... and there you find a place where you can camp for a little while and make a base for the future lying ahead...    

Well, this is quite an optimistic ending... but i guess thats what generally happens if an honest effort is put in... because sometimes people are not even honest with their own selves and not put in a whole hearted effort to save their own selves from the situations that they are in... 

To our Beliefs, Hopes, Strength & Will... Cheers...!!!

* Source of the Data: Asti & Asti only.